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Squishable LUXXE Octopus
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    • Squishable LUXXE Octopus
    • $999999
    • Purchase Squishable LUXXE Octopus
    Description
    Whether you're an heiress enjoying the fruits of your grandfather's fruit empire, or an investment banker with some leftover change from dinner at that truffles and champagne-only restaurant, you deserve a reward!We humbly present to you this rare specimen of craftsmanship and cuddliness, designed for only the most discerning connoisseurs. The Squishable Luxxe Octopus is precisely fashioned from the finest rich, Corinthian leather by craftsmen with top-notch graduate degrees (and low golf handicaps). In order to make sure the crystal eyes were the clearest available, we stole them from the optics assembly of the Hubble Space Telescope with a robotic spacecraft built exclusively for this purpose. The stuffing is made from the same material as the toupees of America's most respected business moguls, mixed with ethically-sourced, cast-off hummingbird fuzz! Order your butler to order one today!
    Details: 15 luxury inches of April Foolery, leather and crystal, all new materials except for the toupees of business moguls and the hummingbird fuzz, ages 3 and up!
    This item gets free shipping to the continental US on orders over $75!
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    Reviews
    AVERAGE REVIEW   5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5
    12 REVIEWS
    Write a Review
    AVERAGE REVIEW   5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5
    12 REVIEWS
    Write a Review
    5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Above Average for Below Sea Level
    Katrina
    New Port Richey , Florida
    4-1-2014
    I have been ordering Squishables for some time now, and between all of my Narwhals and Cthulhus and Foxes and Puffer Fishes and Red Pandas, THIS IS THE BEST. While I may have had to sell both of my husbands kidneys to buy it, I can say I have never snuggled with a more fine Corinthian leather product- and I am an expert in said leather products. After I checked out and my payment was executed in full, it took approx. 16 seconds to arrive at my door. It could have been faster, but it was well worth the wait. I finally have someone whose eyes sparkle as much as mine do. (: Thank you Squishable!
    5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Absolutely MARVELOUS darling!
    A Rich Lady
    Rich Estates , CA
    4-1-2014
    I absolutely adore this piece! It goes perfectly with my silk and cashmere couch! I completely ADORE this piece! Really cheap too! Comes with champagne and hand delivered in a golden carriage drawn by blue-blooded Arabian horses! I could not be happier!
    5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Wow
    Doge
    Lost , Confusion
    4-1-2014
    Much octopus, many fancy, such bubbles, very class, wow, plz moar.
    4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 With this many arms...
    Ms. DeMarco
    Cleveland , OH
    4-1-2014
    Why can't it drive my Porsche? I figured anything that costs this much should be multi-functional: drive my Porsche, clean my three kitchens, beat the servants. But it just sits there. I'm going to think about how lazy it is while I go get my third pedicure of the week.
    5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Octopus With Stars for Eyes
    A Really Fancy and Rich Dude (you can trust me for sure)
    Fircrest , WA
    4-1-2014
    I simply could not continue to exist without the wonderful creature, and promptly made sure Alfred ordered one for me. When it came, encased in a diamond crusted box and gold flake packaging tape (wonderful selection by the way), I was more than ecstatic. Everything about this Octopus is the finest money can buy, right down to the hummingbird fluff. As an avid collector of hummingbird fluff, I can confirm with extreme certainty that this is of the highest grade fluff money can buy. The only flaw with my Octopus, if you could call it that, was that instead of two eyes taken from the optical assembly of the Hubble Telescope, he only had one. His other eye was, in fact, the Hubble Space Telescope itself. I was surprised to see this, but it just makes my Octopus even fancier with an expensive and high end monocle such as the Hubble, so thank you for giving him 20/20 vision. Would definitely recommend to others who have the money to buy one.
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